Confessions of a Spider Killer
Posted: August 30, 2010 | Author: Doug | Filed under: Buddhism, Ireland, Religion, Seattle | 9 Comments »As someone who strives to follow the Buddhist path as best I can, I still find I struggle with upholding the basic code of conduct, the Five Moral Precepts, which have are at their root a way of being beneficial toward others and achieving a peace of mind in oneself. One of my worst offenses I feel is my ongoing battle with spiders in and around the home.
Since I was a kid, I have had a pretty strong fear of spiders, culminating in a few incidents over the years. As a teenager, I remember one morning waking up from a sleeping bag, which I opened to discover a spider scampering out. Another time, last year, while working very late night on an issue for work, had an encounter with a large, fast spider that really shook me up. The fact is, while most insects don’t bother me too much, nor do snakes or other critters, spiders scare the bejaysus out of me. In the old days, I didn’t hesitate to kill them, but as I took an interest in Buddhism about six years ago, I realized that I had to find other ways. I learned to restrain my fear enough to usually scoop them up, and throw them out where possible, but sometimes I’ve run into spiders just too big and scary for me, and I regret that I still reach for the nearest heavy book and smash them. Last night, while working late night (on-call for work again), I had large spider run across my carpet in the den right in front of me, and I panicked and whacked it with a book. I felt even worse for doing this right under my Buddhist altar that sits on the bookshelf ironically, as this felt like an insult to Buddhism or an egregious case of hypocrisy.
In our current house, which we purchased after our time in Ireland was done and we moved back to the US, there are a lot of gaps and places where spiders seem to appear. We’ve tried chestnuts and cedar balls to no avail. They accumulate in our garage and my wife seems to encounter almost one per day lately. We think the doors aren’t sealed well, and that they’re getting in through those, so I hope to get those replaced (for other reasons too such as saving energy costs) and save myself the trouble of having to encounter spiders, and not have a reason to kill them. After all, if I can have peace of mind, and leave them alone, I suppose it’s a win-win situation, right?
But meanwhile, I read an excellent website by a spider specialist at the University of Washington (my alma mater) about the many persistent myths about spiders, some of which surprised me:
- The spiders you usually see in the home are ‘house spiders’ and not from the outside. They’re an especially adapted sub-group that doesn’t survive well outdoors either, so tossing them out in a cup just delays their death a little longer. Likewise, spiders on the outside don’t like to come in because it’s too dry and not a well-suited environment.
- The vast majority of “spider bites” while people sleep are in fact not caused by spiders. Usually these are almost always caused by skin conditions (bacterial, viral, etc), or more rarely other bugs (which spiders eat anyway). The myth is recorded as far back as 1901 and has never been proven correct.
- Spiders cannot come up through drains. Instead, house spiders are very thirsty and get trapped in the porcelain tubs.
- The large, fast spiders you see in the home especially here in the Seattle area are not Wolf Spiders. Wolf Spiders are not house spiders anyway. Instead, this is the Giant House Spider, an accidental import from Europe. Chances are, the one I saw last night, and the one that freaked me out in Ireland was the same species, since they’re known for their speed.
- Spiders only appear more often in autumn because males are looking for mates.
- Spiders rarely get into bed with you, and if you keep bedsheets off the ground and away from walls, it’s impossible.
The point here of course is that misinformation and ignorance on my part, along with deep-seeded phobia, means that I keep killing spiders and breaking the precepts. The rational side of me figures they’re helpful for controlling other potential pests. The Taoist-leaning side of me says to let Nature take its course and the population will control itself.
But the irrational side of me simply cant stand to see them. My skin crawls when I see even a little one. I don’t even like cleaning out the garage or doing yard-work for fear of stumbling onto one by accident. On the practical side, I know for my home at least I can start by keeping closets more tidy and organized and fixing the garage door at last which has a huge gap in the bottom. Keeping the garage tidy and getting rid of all the empty cardboard boxes would be wise too.
On the Buddhist side, I’ve worked over the years to improve mindfulness and concentration in order to avoid the kind of half-awake, blind reaction people normally do, and yet I still fail as I did last night.
At times like this I really start to wonder if I am cut out to be a Buddhist or not. At the very least I would like to control my arachnophobia better but don’t know how.
Hello, this blog is about my life as a father, Buddhist and Japanophile. Any useful information I can pass along will hopefully make the 
I like the title of this one.
I go through mixed feelings about how to deal with the spiders. One of the biggest hurdles when it comes to spiders, and bugs in general, is that they are not out to get you. When a person sees a spider crawling around they instinctively feel like it is going to bite them. Once you come to terms that they’re just moving along on their own business and likely don’t care about you, it becomes easier to deal with them. Though they will bite out of fear of you, which makes humanely relocating them harder.
I was doing pretty well with the catch and release technique, but the really fast ones and the really small ones are harder to relocate without squashing them in the process. I’ve now turned to chemicals in order to deter them, spraying areas where they may come in so I don’t have to kill them once their in. Essentially taking a prevention strategy.
The note on spiders getting trapped in tubs is definitely true. I’ll stand there watching them trying to climb out and keep slipping down. A bit comical when you think about the fact that they can climb on a ceiling, but not up a tub.
Just a fun spider story from a few years ago; I was sitting next to my computer and the screen saver was running and I noticed this pretty spider decoration making it’s way across the screen. As I watched it cross, I noticed it leave the screen and started crawling onto the back of the screen. I paused for a moment grasping at what I just saw, then quickly went to grab something to deal with him. I got him outside without incident and no squashing.
My arachnophobia has mellowed with age. I get a lot of tiny black dudes in my apartment, generally no problem, although one did freak me out mildly by walking across my arm while I was asleep. I think these may be an example of the kind that will not survive well outdoors. So I just ask them to leave in a loud voice, emphasizing the potential danger of remaining here. Incense smoke may also be a positive factor (maybe tricky with a young human in the house). For me the cockroaches are a much bigger problem. I have smashed several, not proud of it! For a really big scare, try an image search for the huntsman spider of Australia!
I can completely relate to this. Out here in the middle of no-where the spiders in our house are brown recluses. My wife was bit by one and it is truly amazing (and horrible) the damage these spiders do. Her aunt also has them in her house and she had an exterminator come to get rid of them. He came 4 times total and on the last visit basically just told her “good luck” getting rid of them. Evidently, these aren’t the average, run-of-the-mill spiders. The poison has to contact them directly. So, while I do try to respect all life as a Buddhist, I have to admit that I kill these spiders, the brown recluses, with zeal. I have seen what they do. And we have children in here to think about. So when I kill one, I look at it as that is one spider that will not be harming my family.
Wow, great comments from everyone. I have to agree with everyone at some point or another.
P.S. Wish I had time to write more, but very busy today.
That hutsman spider (we call them Avondale Spiders) will do wonders against those cockroaches Johnl!
That was an excellent site on spiders, full of things I didn’t know. Unfortunately knowledge sort of goes out the window when there is one on you arm maybe. I like the four-pairs of legs guys.
Snakes I’m not so calm about, don’t even mention the four letter w word.
Despite what I know, I act irrationally. When I hear the buzzing, I throw my arms around and run. Great way to get stung. Fear leads to anger, but in the end I cannot see that there is something that can be done rid oneself entirely of a phobia, yet while that phobia exists we are breaking the Five Basic Precepts, even if we don’t drop the book on it or we run from it, or hide from it. I just have to accept I will never be able to master them, which means I don’ even qualify for rebirth as a human.
If only there was another way
Namu Amida Butsu
Stephen
It seems you’re not alone in worrying about the consequences of killing insects. An insecticide company famously sought to alleviate their guilt (?) by building a monument on Koyasan.
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Koyasan-Okunoin-shiroari-ireihi.jpg
I have no particular fear of spiders so maybe I don’t know what it’s like.
But a couple of things occur to me. It seems that the Buddhist way would be to work to try to overcome your fear. After all it’s all in your mind. And maybe I’m wrong but a lot of Buddhist teaching is about training the mind. Maybe you don’t have to be successful but you should attempt the journey. (It seems to me that because you are bothered by your actions, you are already on the journey)
Also (and I can’t remember where I read it) I once read a piece by a Buddhist scholar that discussed the idea that not all life is the same, that killing a spider (while wrong) is not the same as killing a mammal let alone a human.
The other thing that occurs to me is that you should try not to pass this fear on to your daughter…
Hi guys:
Stephen: I read on Wikipedia that they do indeed often eat cockroaches, so it’s probably worth having one or two around the house, even though they’re scary looking. :p
Robert: Good advice actually. You go me thinking about about the importance of effort, over results, though certainly both matter. As for severity of taking life, that’s something I’ve heard, but seems subjective to me. Then again, what do you do about bacteria and such?
ooooh! ive had 4 HUGE brown S’s in my living room over a period of about 7 days and i can hardly cope any more im on edge all the time. we have large conifers tree’s out in the garden and when its warm i do open the windows so im assuming they come from there but if they are already in the house this is worse, how can i tell? i am so terrified of them i cant live like this any more and im sick of my fear controlling me, on the other hand i have NO intention of making ‘friends’ with these creatures i just want to keep em out!
Hi Louise and welcome to the JLR, and apologies for the delay in replying. It’s a tough situation. This weekend, my wife and I went through our entire yard and clipped and trimmed all the branches and shrubs around our house, since many of them have branches hanging really close to our house. Even if the outside spiders aren’t getting in, they are making a mess of our porch and such, so it was time. At the very least, our yard looks much, much better. For the indoor spiders, I am not sure there’s anything to be really done at this point, but then again they do eat pests I never see, so I guess it’s not all bad.
I will say though, having spent an entire day clearing shrub and brushing spiders off my gloves, I don’t quite fear them as much as I did earlier in the day. Frankly I just got tired of it and was too busy working to care by the afternoon. I guess it’s more of a mental aversion than anything else. :-/
Best of luck, and please let me know if you resolve your phobia or not.